my interest in life.

During COVID-19 I have lost my interest in the world. Life just seems bland. Time goes by so quickly during the weekends, but so slowly during school. Everyday repeats. Wake up, school, eat, chores, dinner, sleep. Fun activities are restricted, and I spend 90 percent of the time indoors. I spend hours staring at a screen each day. I want to break this routine and every once in a while I do, but i’m still caught in a loop I can’t get out of. I worry too much about death, or what happens after death. I let my mind run loose and think of all the bad things in this world. I’ve lost my spirit. I’ve lost positivity. I want to regain these components. But I don’t know if I ever will. I’ve become sort of a bland person, never wanting to do anything, but I get mad at myself when I don’t. I don’t have it nearly as bad as others, who have lost family members. It pains me to hear some people still doubt COVID-19 exists, even after all that’s happened. It’s hard to grip the reality that over 2.74 million people have died. But it’s the world, and nothing is ever fair.

Location: Manhattan Beach, California

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